I get such a kick of hearing euphemisms in Real Estate! Disclosure: for the future, I reserve the right that I might use these terms with actual listings. Here are some of my favorites:
Original: no updates have ever been done….ever.
Shabby Chic: a lot more shabby than chic.
Charming: small, weird and quite probably yellow
Eclectic: the layout makes no sense, several colors are represented on the walls.
One of a kind: the only made one for a reason!
Quick closing possible: the home is empty and the vagrants are eye-balling it.
Cozy: tiny homes are the new thing doncha know.
Cute: see “Cozy”
Family home: my fair-housing alarms go off, could be “well-loved”?
Motivated: if you bring the right price